What it's like to interview an alleged voyeur — a man you happened to know and like

For journalist Katherine Laidlaw, interviewing her acquaintance Pete Forde was one of the hardest things she's ever done. 

Forde, CEO of the Toronto tech company itsme3D, was charged with seven counts of voyeurism in March.

Police allege his computer contained troves of images and videos of women — his friends, acquaintances and roommates. Some were gathered simply from social media, while others were allegedly shot surreptitiously, including a video of his roommate in the shower.

None of the allegations have proven in court.

When Laidlaw interviewed him for Toronto Life, she asked: "Do I have a folder?"

She joined As It Happens host Carol Off in studio to discuss her feature story "Inside the Mind of a Voyeur." Here is part of their conversation. 

You knew Pete Forde even before you got the assignment. What did you think when you first heard the details about this?

I was really taken aback. And I think it's because Pete has always positioned himself as a real progressive and a feminist. 

Beneath the surface ... there was another Pete Forde doing something dark and secret, allegedly. We know this has yet to be proven in court, but what was he doing?

My understanding of how it started was that he would occasionally pull photos — you know, sexy photos some of his friends had uploaded to Facebook or various social media — into this pictures folder.

He organized it and then labelled some of the folders by women's names. 

The folders sort of grew and grew to the point where he, I guess, was using some of his camera equipment to spy on predominantly women who were his roommates, although there are a couple of other complainants involved in the case with other circumstances as well.

He was allegedly using snake cams predominantly to sort of slide under the bathroom door at his townhouse [and] spy on his roommates in the shower. 

The contents of the folder also include crotch shots, upskirt shots and nudes.

Because you knew Pete Forde, he agreed to an interview with you after he'd been charged. He's now living at his dad's and you went to see him. What was that like?

I was nervous going. I didn't know what it was going to be like. I hadn't seen him in awhile, even before all of that had happened.

What did he say? How did he explain this to you?

I didn't really ask him whether or not he had done the things he was accused of. I just asked him why he did them.

And he said that he doesn't have an answer that satisfies himself yet, which is fair and maybe understandable.

He reiterated over and over that he knows his actions have harmed a large number of people, that he feels terrible for his family. He has a younger sister.

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Does he understand there are victims of these kinds of crimes?

Certainly, yes. That said, will he ever fully feel what they are feeling? No. 

And I think [that's] part of the reason I included at the end of the story some of the jokes he was making.

There was a particular line that really stands out that I know has really affected people, because I've heard from them — the one where he says: I still dream about us all "hugging it out."

While he certainly expressed remorse, there was another layer going on ... where, when I would say, "Well, voyeurism is a new crime," he would say, "Well, I've always been a trailblazer, Katherine."

Societally, we have a lot of work to do, because you were supposed to be one of the good ones- Katherine Laidlaw, Toronto Life 

The most important question that you asked — which is as a journalist, but also as a woman and as a former friend — you asked him if you were one of the women, if he had a folder on you. 

That was a hard question for him. He was visibly stricken by that and said, "No." 

I said, "OK, that's what I thought."

My Facebook presence is pretty limited. I don't update it very often.

Then he continued, unprompted. 

He said, "There are a number of reasons for that."

I thought he was going to say, "I really respected your ex-partner," who was a longtime friend of his, or "I really respect you." 

And he said, "Opportunity. Mechanisms." And then he said, "I'm not a wizard."

What does that mean?

I took it to be that it was an opportunity thing. Like, if I'd been to the house or something ...

How do you feel about that?

I felt in the moment like I had to very deftly maintain my composure, which was rapidly slipping away. And I felt appalled.

I went home and sort of sat with that for a few days and just thought "Wow. Societally, we have a lot of work to do, because you were supposed to be one of the good ones."

Written by Sheena Goodyear. Produced by Imogen Birchard. This Q&A is an excerpt from a feature-length interview, edited for length and clarity.